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This Is Why I Can't Have a Farm

I just read about the cat that was wrapped in duct tape. I now have an overwhelming urge to find out how to adopt that cat.

This is a huge problem of mine. Given the opportunity, I'd end up a crazy cat person.

...slash crazy dog person...slash crazy lemur person...

It's not just a love of animals; it's an unhealthy obsession.

Aside from rats--the devil's creatures--I'm incredibly sympathetic to anything with fur.

I find the most random animals adorable. I'm the only person I know who ever actually felt a desire to adopt a colony of prairie dogs. Given the opportunity, I'm confident that I would adopt the entire cast of Beethoven's 2nd.

I suppose the best thing for me would be to have a farm. But considering how much I hate getting up early and my aversion to udders, I don't know if it would work out well.

As of now, I have a cat named Duncan and a dog named Peaches. I don't really see how eight or nine more animals would make much of a difference in my life, but just imagine the difference I could make in theirs.

Imagine the love I could give to a pot-bellied pig named Oreo or a goat named Pablo or a small grizzly bear with a really nice temperament--

Okay, maybe I'm going a bit overboard.

...Is it so wrong to want a kangaroo?

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