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Watch Love, Actually

If you want to get in the Christmas spirit

Play "Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas"--obviously
Watch "It's a Wonderful Life"--obviously
Go see "A Christmas Carol"--obviously

But if that's still not working

Put up Christmas lights around your microwave
Start a caroling group comprised of Austrian orphans
Throw a costume party
Where everybody has to come
Dressed up like obscure Christmas characters
Like the Little Match Girl

If it hasn't snowed where you are
Then make a snowman out of cotton balls
Granted, you'll need a LOT more cotton balls
But it'll be worth it
Because you'll have the cushiest snowman EVER

Rent reindeer as pets for the holiday season
Just make sure you own a farm
And that you a stable
And that you're good with animals
That might be surly
Because reindeer can be surly

Also, rent "Ernest Saves Christmas"
And other movies that involve
Characters saving Christmas

Because in those movies
Christmas is always saved
And that's hopeful

But most of all--get Love, Actually

It's about love
And Christmas
And a little black girl
Singing "All I Want for Christmas"

And if that doesn't make you want to decorate a tree
And have yourself some ham

Then you might just be a green man
With a little dog
Whose heart is deformed
From being born in a cave
Above a happy town

Just sayin'

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