I have a brilliant idea for a store.
Well, more like a shop.
Like a mechanic shop.
Sort of like a Valvoline, but with a notable difference.
All the shop does is fix what you ask to have fixed.
I'd call it "Just Fix It."
Want to replace a tire?
All they do is replace the tire.
Want an oil change?
All they do is give you an oil change.
Want to have your brakes checked while a dead body rots in your backseat?
They won't say a word about the body, or the bloody knife in the front seat. They'll just check the brakes.
If you think this sounds like an idea somebody should have already had by now, you're absolutely right, but for some reason, nobody has.
Whenever I get any simple job done on my car, I get a phone call from the mechanic informing me that my engine is filled with orange juice and my windshield is about to explode in my face for a mysterious reason that only mechanics know.
Think about how great it would be if there was a shop where no matter what kind of shape your car is in, the mechanic only does what you ask him to do.
The slogan could be--"Just Fix It--Because You Only Have Money to Fix the Simplest Thing Wrong With Your Car."
Or--"Just Fix It--Because You Don't Care If the Radiator Stops Working a Month From Now. You'll Deal With It Then, So Shut Up and Replace My Windshield Wipers, Jerkface."
...Okay, maybe those are too long.
But you see my point.
Most of us avoid getting routine maintenance done on our cars because we simply don't want to hear about whatever might be going wrong with it, even though we know it's probably fine and some mechanic is probably just trying to screw us.
But even if they aren't, we still don't want to know.
We.Don't.Want.To.Know.
And for those of us who like being blissfully ignorant, I say "Just Fix It."
A place for the procrastinators and the vehicularly unlucky.
Just let us replace our tires, and walk away.
I think it'd be a big hit.
Well, more like a shop.
Like a mechanic shop.
Sort of like a Valvoline, but with a notable difference.
All the shop does is fix what you ask to have fixed.
I'd call it "Just Fix It."
Want to replace a tire?
All they do is replace the tire.
Want an oil change?
All they do is give you an oil change.
Want to have your brakes checked while a dead body rots in your backseat?
They won't say a word about the body, or the bloody knife in the front seat. They'll just check the brakes.
If you think this sounds like an idea somebody should have already had by now, you're absolutely right, but for some reason, nobody has.
Whenever I get any simple job done on my car, I get a phone call from the mechanic informing me that my engine is filled with orange juice and my windshield is about to explode in my face for a mysterious reason that only mechanics know.
Think about how great it would be if there was a shop where no matter what kind of shape your car is in, the mechanic only does what you ask him to do.
The slogan could be--"Just Fix It--Because You Only Have Money to Fix the Simplest Thing Wrong With Your Car."
Or--"Just Fix It--Because You Don't Care If the Radiator Stops Working a Month From Now. You'll Deal With It Then, So Shut Up and Replace My Windshield Wipers, Jerkface."
...Okay, maybe those are too long.
But you see my point.
Most of us avoid getting routine maintenance done on our cars because we simply don't want to hear about whatever might be going wrong with it, even though we know it's probably fine and some mechanic is probably just trying to screw us.
But even if they aren't, we still don't want to know.
We.Don't.Want.To.Know.
And for those of us who like being blissfully ignorant, I say "Just Fix It."
A place for the procrastinators and the vehicularly unlucky.
Just let us replace our tires, and walk away.
I think it'd be a big hit.
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