I think I've discovered the secret to working with the general public in Rhode Island.
Be rude.
Sound crazy?
Trust me, it might not be.
When you do theater (and work a day job in addition to that), you end up interacting with a diverse group of strangers on a regular basis.
You start to develop theories--some crazy (Why does everybody in the market decide to check out at the same time? It's a conspiracy!)--and some not so crazy.
Here's my this-might-not-be-so-crazy theory:
I think people respect you a little bit more when you're rude to them.
Or at least, rude people seem to respect you more when you're rude to them. Maybe it's like anything else--maybe they just like having someone speak their language to them.
It seems a little absurd, but I've seen too many examples to make me think it's a fluke, and I'm starting to wonder if it's a Rhode Island thing.
When I was a teenager, I worked a few retail jobs, and I always saw the same situation play out time and again. Some irate customer would be giving some corporate drone a hard time, and the drone would have to stay calm and polite, which only seemed to exacerbate the jerk that was yelling at them. One time, a fellow co-worker of mine, not being able to help herself, blurted out--
"Sir, you're being a jerk."
This seemed to have some magical effect on the guy. He immediately stopped yelling at our supervisor, and got much quieter. It was almost like having someone be polite to him was the equivalent of throwing gasoline on his fire. Rudeness was the water we needed.
I guess it might be a little like the jungle: You have to stare down the lion or it eats you. (I've seen a few restaurant customers who actually seemed capable of this.)
Years later, I still run into situations like that time and again.
Now, I'm not advocating rudeness if someone's not being rude to you. And I guess rudeness even when someone's being rude to you might cost you your job in a lot of scenarios, but I would encourage a little abruptness instead of trying to appease the rude person you're dealing with. Not just because it might get them to back off, but because it's a little crazy that we've created a society where being rude in any situation has you being met with unconditional kindness.
Sometimes people just need to be told to knock it off.
Be rude.
Sound crazy?
Trust me, it might not be.
When you do theater (and work a day job in addition to that), you end up interacting with a diverse group of strangers on a regular basis.
You start to develop theories--some crazy (Why does everybody in the market decide to check out at the same time? It's a conspiracy!)--and some not so crazy.
Here's my this-might-not-be-so-crazy theory:
I think people respect you a little bit more when you're rude to them.
Or at least, rude people seem to respect you more when you're rude to them. Maybe it's like anything else--maybe they just like having someone speak their language to them.
It seems a little absurd, but I've seen too many examples to make me think it's a fluke, and I'm starting to wonder if it's a Rhode Island thing.
When I was a teenager, I worked a few retail jobs, and I always saw the same situation play out time and again. Some irate customer would be giving some corporate drone a hard time, and the drone would have to stay calm and polite, which only seemed to exacerbate the jerk that was yelling at them. One time, a fellow co-worker of mine, not being able to help herself, blurted out--
"Sir, you're being a jerk."
This seemed to have some magical effect on the guy. He immediately stopped yelling at our supervisor, and got much quieter. It was almost like having someone be polite to him was the equivalent of throwing gasoline on his fire. Rudeness was the water we needed.
I guess it might be a little like the jungle: You have to stare down the lion or it eats you. (I've seen a few restaurant customers who actually seemed capable of this.)
Years later, I still run into situations like that time and again.
Now, I'm not advocating rudeness if someone's not being rude to you. And I guess rudeness even when someone's being rude to you might cost you your job in a lot of scenarios, but I would encourage a little abruptness instead of trying to appease the rude person you're dealing with. Not just because it might get them to back off, but because it's a little crazy that we've created a society where being rude in any situation has you being met with unconditional kindness.
Sometimes people just need to be told to knock it off.
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