Skip to main content

Politicians Who Can Talk

The thing we--
(And I’m using the Liberal We here)
The thing we need to remember in 2018
And especially in 2020
Is that we need politicians
Who know how to talk
Let me explain
Remember how we mocked the current President
On the campaign trail
Because he was such a poor speaker
And he never did the smart thing
The smart thing being--
Using a teleprompter?
Well, I think we might have been wrong about that
Obviously, like half the planet
I’ve been wondering
Where exactly everything went wrong
Last year
And smarter people than me
Will come up with better reasons
But I think one thing we need to keep an eye on
Is how people talk now
I don’t know about you
But I can’t handle listening to local news anymore
Because the newscaster “voices”
Drive me insane
It’s this presentational way of speaking
That just comes across as fake
So fake
And I can’t believe a thing I’m hearing
It occurred to me recently
That while I have many, many issues
About what the President is saying
He does sound like he’s speaking truthfully
Even when he’s clearly not
Because he’s not reading
Off a teleprompter
He’s not reading at all
And even though he probably should
It makes him sound more believable
Whoever we run against him
(Assuming it comes to that)
Has to know how to do something
That, sadly, Hillary Clinton couldn’t do
And that’s speak off the cuff
In a casual way
That still sounds authoritative
Actually, that’s not fair
Clinton could do that
It’s just that everyone was telling her
It was unwise
Here we all were
Running around
Trying to figure out
Why nobody trusted her
And then we hand her a script
A SCRIPT
And have her deliver it over and over again
Sounding like a robot the entire time
Wondering why people thought she was stiff
And untrustworthy
She said at one point
That a President has to watch what they say
And I get that
But maybe right now
In the age we’re living in
A President has to be able to watch what they say
In the moment
As if they’ve been on camera
For most of their life
Because we’ve all grown up
Watching people
Who knew they were on camera
Who could edit themselves
In the moment
And I think we need politicians

Who can do the same

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

A List of People Who Can Go to Hell Now That I Can't Have Elizabeth Warren

So today was a rough day for everybody who isn't a @#$%-ing #$%hole. Let's just start there. If that upsets you, by all means, go straight to hell. This entire rant is going to be exactly what it sounds like. I am mad and I am going to exercise my right to BLOG ABOUT IT LIKE IT'S 1995, SO BUCKLE UP, BUTTERCUP. I really don't even know where to start, so let's just jump right in with the first person who comes to mind. Bloomberg, go to hell.  You really didn't have anything specific to do with today, but you can just go to hell for spending an ungodly amount of money on literally nothing.  I mean, you could have lit millions of dollars on fire and at least warmed the hands of the homeless, but instead, you made tv stations across the country that are already owned by Conservatives rich, so kudos to you and go to hell. Amy Klobuchar, I STUCK UP FOR YOU AMY.  I got into FIGHTS on SOCIAL MEDIA while DEFENDING your sorry, self-interested ass.  You know ...
42 comments
Read more

Theater and the Outbreak

After last week's interview, a representative from a theater that recently experienced the results of opening too soon reached out to speak with me. I want to thank this person for coming forward in the hopes that it'll change some minds about what's safe and what isn't when it comes to the performing arts. Here's the interview: ME:  So this wasn't a full production or-- THEM:  No. It was us trying to do a little something for friends and donors. ME:  Who is 'us?' THEM:  The board of _____. ME:  And how long have you been on the board? THEM:  Three years. ME:  What was this going to be? THEM:  There's a, uh, beautiful park here in town, and we wanted to do an outdoor performance of a Shakespeare as a benefit, because, as you know, theaters are having a hard time right now paying the bills. We checked with the local government and the health department for the state to make sure we were doing everything the way we needed to in order to keep everyon...
7 comments
Read more

People You Know Are More Important Than People You Don't Know

This post is in response to arguing with people--straight and gay alike--about a certain celebrity, whether or not she's an ally, if she's pandering, if pandering matters, and whether or not I'm an asshole. The last part is probably an enthusiastic "Yes" but let's reflect on this for a bit anyway without actually giving more time to an argument about a person none of us know, which is a crucial part of what I want to talk about. People you know are more important than people you don't know. I realize it's tricky in an age where we've never been closer or more engaged to our celebrities to keep in mind that we do not know them, they are not our friends, and while we may love them and stan and feel like we're attacked when they're attacked-- That is not true. That is not real. They are in no tangible way connected to us. Now, as someone who is obsessed with pop culture, I get that it's a little hypocritical for me to be making...
Post a Comment
Read more