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The Ghost Show

Now you all know I love shows that involve ghosts, ghostly things, dead people, college boys who believe in Wicca, and shaky camerawork, but what really makes a ghost show great?

Here are my guidelines:

1) Haunted Places--Not Things--Places: I don't care how many haunted prisons and old Southern plantations you go to, it's still better than examining a haunted piano. Paranormal State is my favorite ghost-hunting show, but at times they can get a little...well...lame. They investigated a piano--that's right--a piano. Suffice it to say, the episode was less than enthralling. Part of the problem is--

2) Time Limit--Half hour ghost shows are ridiculous. If you can't fill up an hour, don't bother. I want a good hour of scary stuff, and by the time Paranormal State gets to the investigation, they've only got ten minutes left. It's all sizzle, no ghost steak.

3) Reenactments Aren't Always a Bad Thing--The Discovery Show "A Haunting" offers reenactments with each episode. Now, at first, you'd think this would seem silly--especially since they tend to cast people who look NOTHING like the actual people. The benefit is that once you get past how silly the whole thing is, you start enjoying how silly the whole thing is, and then the whole experience becomes like a jubilant Rocky Horror Show right in your living room.

4) Keep the Team Small--I don't like ghost shows that become like soap operas. "Who's that girl? Is she on the team? Does she work at the haunted ice cream parlor? Who's he? Is he her boyfriend? What's happening?" Keep the team small, or don't bring up the team at all. There's an ever-changing cast of P-State, and I never care because they don't care either.

5) Don't Let Dumb Frat Boys Hunt Ghosts. This rule speaks for itself.

That's all.

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