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Showing posts from January, 2017

Politicians Who Can Talk

The thing we--
(And I’m using the Liberal We here)
The thing we need to remember in 2018 And especially in 2020 Is that we need politicians Who know how to talk
Let me explain
Remember how we mocked the current President On the campaign trail
Because he was such a poor speaker And he never did the smart thing The smart thing being-- Using a teleprompter?
Well, I think we might have been wrong about that
Obviously, like half the planet I’ve been wondering
Where exactly everything went wrong Last year
And smarter people than me Will come up with better reasons But I think one thing we need to keep an eye on Is how people talk now
I don’t know about you But I can’t handle listening to local news anymore Because the newscaster “voices”

Just End the Damn Thing Already

I was reading an article In Entertainment Weekly Or, the Bible, as I refer to it The Weekly Bible of Entertainment—
(Less Offensive?  Maybe?)
—And they were talking about how Nobody wants to end tv shows anymore On a final note Because they might have to be rebooted later on And they need to leave the door Open for that
And reading that Made me want to find a lava pit And cast myself into it The way I keep hoping Britt Robertson (sp? Never mind.  Don’t care.) will
In addition to everything else We’re losing in the world
We’re now losing ENDINGS?

Like, we can’t endings anymore, folks The world won’t allow it
I swear to god If I ever get to be involved with a tv show I am ending the series With everyone on the show Riding a bus That goes right into a canyon
And that will kill me Because I will probably love all those characters Most of whom will be teenagers Because I refuse to write any tv show That isn’t an obvious homage to Dawson’s Creek But I will kill them for the greater good So…

Never Mind the Audience

Someone gave me Some good Advice
Never mind the audience
It’s great because It’s something you already know But you never actually say
Never mind the audience
I asked the person Giving me the advice To elaborate And, I’m gonna paraphrase, But this is what they said
First off, never mind the audience You have no control over them
Only yourself
All your life you hear people say What other people think of you Is none of your business And that’s especially true Of an audience
Secondly, an audience is not a thing We talk about it like it’s one thing One group of people The same people Going to every show
People who like the same things And are always open to receiving theater Smart, analytical people with taste Who are going to think constructively about what they’re seeing And respond with tact and graciousness
And that’s not true
There is no audience There are just people
People who have bad days
And good days Who got bad news Right before coming to the theater Or good news that’s distr…

Giving Up: The CW

I’m giving up a certain amount of tv Because there’s just too much of it And also— I should probably devote some time To other things Like eating Or reading a book Since, allegedly, I’m a writer
So I’m doing a five-step program Where I give up a little tv A little bit at a time Until I’m down To only the really good stuff
Like Veep and twelve hours of Food Network a day
That should cover All my small screen needs
The first step is the CW Land of Hot Models Who Can Speak Words Sort of Clearly And the Superheroes Who Love Them
CW is comfort food And I get that But these days You can get that high end Mac and Cheese on Netflix You don’t need to be eating that Velveeta anymore, gurl
Plus, I have some issues With most of those shows
The Flash is adorable, but Grant Guslin Is pretty clearly gay And no matter what beard they stick on his chin It just never reads
Supergirl has actually gotten better As it goes along But I just don’t see the long game for it
I don’t see the long game For any …

Political Capital

We need to talk about something That might happen
And, if it does happen, What we’re going to do about it
So there is a possibility That sometime In the next four years Or before he’s impeached The President Might Do something Good
And I mean, really good Like, for lots of people Including or especially for The people who didn’t vote for him
Maybe it’ll be economically driven Maybe it’ll be more socially progressive than we’re expecting Maybe he’ll just give us all free tickets to a Broadway show
Who knows?

The point is When he does it When he puts forward that idea And sends it to Congress We have to ask our politicians To kill it
We have to kill the thing That we’re probably going to like
Why?

Because we can’t give him any political capital
We just can’t
It would be nice to think We’re living in a country
Where people can understand bipartisanship And how it works And give credit to both parties When they unite to make good things happen But the fact is We are not living in that co…

Finding the Words

Lately, I keep wishing
I was smarter
Or, maybe ‘smarter’ Is the wrong word
Maybe I just wish
I was more articulate Or--insightful
Insightful Is probably The right word
I wish I could Find the words
I think we’re all Sort of feeling that way
It’s like we’re all close To something
But we don’t know what it is And we’re just hoping it’s not You know The Nuclear Apocalypse
It’s as if we’re all collectively Sitting in a car Listening to a sad song On the radio And it’s raining outside And we really don’t want to get out of the car

Silver Linings

I might be going crazy Because lately I’ve been wondering If there’s a silver lining To Hillary losing the election
Hear me out
If Secretary Clinton--my chosen candidate Had won the election We would essentially be In the same spot we were in With President Obama For the past two years With a Republican controlled Congress Intent on doing absolutely nothing
And chances are All of us Wouldn’t have been paying attention Because ‘Oh, it’s fine Hillary’s in the White House We’ve got our ally working for us In the Executive Branch We don’t really need To pay attention’
And that would have been a mistake
And even though I wake up every day With the same sense of dread