Skip to main content

Tolerance is Not Negotiable

The disturbing trend in the news lately has been pretty clear.

Young gay students bullied so badly they took their own lives.

Now of course, there have been responses. There is outrage. There are memorials. But people seem to be missing the key here.

It's one word: Unacceptable.

In this country, when prejudice and hatred is an issue of race and/or gender, there is a definitive answer to the discrimination:

It's unacceptable.

Yet when people are targeted for their sexuality, it becomes a "grey area." A "controversial topic." A "hot button issue."

Why?

Why should it be any of those things?

If a bunch of kids tormented a girl because she was a girl or an African-American kid because of his race, it would be stopped.

Let's not mince words here: It would be put to a stop.

Yet we are now witnessing an epidemic of gay students existing during what is supposed to be an enlightened and progressive time in our country, and they are being targeted and attacked.

And still we hear that it's "negotiable."

We can't teach tolerance in schools because the major religions in this country tell us being gay is wrong. If we teach students to have respect for their gay classmates, we're infringing on their religious freedom.

Oh really?

In some religions, women are treated like property and abused for indiscretions. Pretty much every religion believes that women are less than men. We don't honor those religions. One of the things I like about this country is that we say "Feel free to be crazy when you're worshipping wherever it is you worship, but don't think you're bringing that attitude into a school where actual intelligence is valued over dressed up fairy tales."

Instead, we have compartmentalized this country into sections where religious zealots have taken over and taken the "Wild Wild West" approach to tolerance.

"Well, we can't legislate hanging the queers, but we can certainly go after them psychology until they just kill themselves off."

Now, I'm not trying to say that African-Americans or women or other minorities have it easier than gay people in this country, but the one difference is that we have collectively, as a country, said--

It is NOT okay to discriminate against these people.

In these cases, tolerance is not negotiable.

Well, I don't think it should be negotiable for gay people either.

I think we need to start teaching and enforcing respect for people of different sexual orientations in schools, and if certain religious groups object we tell them that dying kids today take priority over ancient scripture written thousands of years ago.

I think if bullying is going on in schools, the result needs to be expulsion. Kids do not care about detention. (Have kids ever cared about detention?) They don't care about suspension. Kids respond to high stakes. Let them know, if you discriminate, you're out.

Not negotiable.

If we teach kids in school today that being homophobic only gets an hour's detention after school or a few days at home to watch tv, what exactly do we expect these kids to grow up thinking and believing?

Show them a photo of the Klan, or the Nazi's, or any extremist group that promotes hate and say--"If you bully someone because of who they are, over something they can't change, you are no different from these people."

That ought to snap a few perspectives into place.

I think if we let there be a pause, a beat, a second, a moment, a stutter, every time a politician, or a celebrity, or even the guy they decide to interview on the news talks about tolerance so they can carefully word their statement to let people know that yes, they feel sorry some gay kid died, but they still think he was wrong for being gay--then what we have on our hands is a lousy, worthless contract.

It is a contract that says just don't kill me, and we're cool.

Unacceptable.

Up to this point, when it came to gay rights, everything was negotiable.

We put a President in the White House who flip-flopped on gay rights, because he knew he didn't need us to win an election because too many of us don't vote, which by the way, is shameful. And we let him flip flop, because we HOPED he would come through for us once he was in office.

Well, there has been progress, but progress isn't enough when we lose three kids in under a month.

Strangely enough it's our President I quote when I hear Harvey Milk's inspirational phrase "You gotta give 'em hope."

As President Obama has said, "Hope"--though wonderful--"is not a plan."

We need a plan.

We have to say that tolerance is not negotiable.

Not anymore.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

A List of People Who Can Go to Hell Now That I Can't Have Elizabeth Warren

So today was a rough day for everybody who isn't a @#$%-ing #$%hole. Let's just start there. If that upsets you, by all means, go straight to hell. This entire rant is going to be exactly what it sounds like. I am mad and I am going to exercise my right to BLOG ABOUT IT LIKE IT'S 1995, SO BUCKLE UP, BUTTERCUP. I really don't even know where to start, so let's just jump right in with the first person who comes to mind. Bloomberg, go to hell.  You really didn't have anything specific to do with today, but you can just go to hell for spending an ungodly amount of money on literally nothing.  I mean, you could have lit millions of dollars on fire and at least warmed the hands of the homeless, but instead, you made tv stations across the country that are already owned by Conservatives rich, so kudos to you and go to hell. Amy Klobuchar, I STUCK UP FOR YOU AMY.  I got into FIGHTS on SOCIAL MEDIA while DEFENDING your sorry, self-interested ass.  You know

Theater and the Outbreak

After last week's interview, a representative from a theater that recently experienced the results of opening too soon reached out to speak with me. I want to thank this person for coming forward in the hopes that it'll change some minds about what's safe and what isn't when it comes to the performing arts. Here's the interview: ME:  So this wasn't a full production or-- THEM:  No. It was us trying to do a little something for friends and donors. ME:  Who is 'us?' THEM:  The board of _____. ME:  And how long have you been on the board? THEM:  Three years. ME:  What was this going to be? THEM:  There's a, uh, beautiful park here in town, and we wanted to do an outdoor performance of a Shakespeare as a benefit, because, as you know, theaters are having a hard time right now paying the bills. We checked with the local government and the health department for the state to make sure we were doing everything the way we needed to in order to keep everyone s

People You Know Are More Important Than People You Don't Know

This post is in response to arguing with people--straight and gay alike--about a certain celebrity, whether or not she's an ally, if she's pandering, if pandering matters, and whether or not I'm an asshole. The last part is probably an enthusiastic "Yes" but let's reflect on this for a bit anyway without actually giving more time to an argument about a person none of us know, which is a crucial part of what I want to talk about. People you know are more important than people you don't know. I realize it's tricky in an age where we've never been closer or more engaged to our celebrities to keep in mind that we do not know them, they are not our friends, and while we may love them and stan and feel like we're attacked when they're attacked-- That is not true. That is not real. They are in no tangible way connected to us. Now, as someone who is obsessed with pop culture, I get that it's a little hypocritical for me to be making