Skip to main content

Is Anybody Excited About This?

Recently, I was reading a magazine that outlined the big projects coming out in the upcoming year.  Some of them I can't wait for--HBO's Game of Thrones series, Steven Spielberg's epic War Horse, and the final novel from David Foster Wallace.

Then there are those projects that the media is convinced I should be excited about, but alas, I'm not having it.

Take Pirates of the Carribbean:  On Stranger Tides.  Nobody seems to be pointing out that the first three movies were meant to be a trilogy, not a franchise.  As a trilogy they worked fairly well, but watching Johnny Depp pull out his old Jack Sparrow costume for the fourth time made me groan in the theater.  I realize this stuff is supposed to be the equivalent of cinematic comfort food, but if you're going to go back for a fourth round, shouldn't you at least have to come up with an exciting reason to?  Based on the trailer, the only difference between this movie and what's already been done with the series is "Hey look!  Penelope Cruz is in this one!"

Ditto for Scream 4.  There should be a rule that if you promote a movie by promising it's going to be the last one, a la Pirates or Scream 3, then you should be forced to sign a contract ensuring that it is, in fact, the last one.  I sat through the last Scream purely because I felt like I owed it to the franchise for scaring me to death back when I was twelve, but I'm not feeling any loyalty this time around.

On television, reality is about to get even bleaker.  A&E is taking advantage of Intervention's popularity by creating a spin-off (that's right, you heard me, an Intervention spin-off) entitled Relapsed, where coaches will help people trying to stay on the wagon.  TLC was actually thrilled to announce that they're doing an entire series on extreme coupon-ers.  All things considered, it might be smart to crack a few more books this year.

Speaking of books, it's a little strange to me that Diane Keaton's memoir is drawing more attention than Wallace's posthumous work.  I'd rather see Diane Keaton do another great movie than read about the ones she's already done.  Tina Fey is also coming out with a book, but even though I love her, the book just seems to be a novelty item.

I don't mean to sound too pessimistic.  There are an awful lot of things to be excited about in the coming year.  For me, the exciting movies, tv shows and books are always the ones that take people by surprise.  Nobody ever predicted that movies like The Hangover and True Grit were going to be blockbuster events when they came out.

Very few things can hurt a project more than too much hype.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

A List of People Who Can Go to Hell Now That I Can't Have Elizabeth Warren

So today was a rough day for everybody who isn't a @#$%-ing #$%hole. Let's just start there. If that upsets you, by all means, go straight to hell. This entire rant is going to be exactly what it sounds like. I am mad and I am going to exercise my right to BLOG ABOUT IT LIKE IT'S 1995, SO BUCKLE UP, BUTTERCUP. I really don't even know where to start, so let's just jump right in with the first person who comes to mind. Bloomberg, go to hell.  You really didn't have anything specific to do with today, but you can just go to hell for spending an ungodly amount of money on literally nothing.  I mean, you could have lit millions of dollars on fire and at least warmed the hands of the homeless, but instead, you made tv stations across the country that are already owned by Conservatives rich, so kudos to you and go to hell. Amy Klobuchar, I STUCK UP FOR YOU AMY.  I got into FIGHTS on SOCIAL MEDIA while DEFENDING your sorry, self-interested ass.  You know

Theater and the Outbreak

After last week's interview, a representative from a theater that recently experienced the results of opening too soon reached out to speak with me. I want to thank this person for coming forward in the hopes that it'll change some minds about what's safe and what isn't when it comes to the performing arts. Here's the interview: ME:  So this wasn't a full production or-- THEM:  No. It was us trying to do a little something for friends and donors. ME:  Who is 'us?' THEM:  The board of _____. ME:  And how long have you been on the board? THEM:  Three years. ME:  What was this going to be? THEM:  There's a, uh, beautiful park here in town, and we wanted to do an outdoor performance of a Shakespeare as a benefit, because, as you know, theaters are having a hard time right now paying the bills. We checked with the local government and the health department for the state to make sure we were doing everything the way we needed to in order to keep everyone s

People You Know Are More Important Than People You Don't Know

This post is in response to arguing with people--straight and gay alike--about a certain celebrity, whether or not she's an ally, if she's pandering, if pandering matters, and whether or not I'm an asshole. The last part is probably an enthusiastic "Yes" but let's reflect on this for a bit anyway without actually giving more time to an argument about a person none of us know, which is a crucial part of what I want to talk about. People you know are more important than people you don't know. I realize it's tricky in an age where we've never been closer or more engaged to our celebrities to keep in mind that we do not know them, they are not our friends, and while we may love them and stan and feel like we're attacked when they're attacked-- That is not true. That is not real. They are in no tangible way connected to us. Now, as someone who is obsessed with pop culture, I get that it's a little hypocritical for me to be making